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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25587967">To Catch Me When I Fall</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/OschonsWanderer/pseuds/OschonsWanderer'>OschonsWanderer</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Best Friends, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Male-Female Friendship, Multi, Other, Relationship(s), Warm and Fuzzy Feelings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 04:41:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,993</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25587967</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/OschonsWanderer/pseuds/OschonsWanderer</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It has been months since the Inquisition defeated Corypheus, and Solas ran off without a word. Ghilina Lavellan, Leader of the Inquisition, refuses to dwell on her broken heart. But is that the best thing for her? Friends take it upon themselves to help.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Female Lavellan &amp; Dorian Pavus, Iron Bull/Dorian Pavus</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>To Catch Me When I Fall</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A/N: Thank you for taking an interest in this fanfiction. It is an idea that came to me out of the blue, and I really liked the idea if a fanfiction that expressed the loving friendship between a female Inquisitor and Dorian Pavus. Dragon Age does not belong to me, all rights belong to Bioware.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     Beyond the balcony, the warm orange glow of the setting sun fell beyond the seam of the world, slowly casting the valley and the surrounding mountains into darkness. They would be lighting the braziers on the ramparts soon. </p><p>     The cold mountain breeze rushed through the open balcony door and blew straight through Ghilina's casual evening finery, licking at the skin beneath with its wintry chill.</p><p>     She dared to look out the tall, ornate windows to see the sky tinged the color of Spindleweed, and the matte black that slowly swept across the sky like a rising tide, bringing with it the beauty of the stars.</p><p>     <em>The moon had a milky glow in the inky black sky, amidst an array of diamond dust stars. The cool wind tugged at the free locks of her black hair, tickling her neck. Ghilina only smiled as she took comfort from the gentle, melodic timbre of the voice behind her. She snuggled her back deeper into his warm, broad chest as his outstretched arm pointed out ancient constellations written in those stars.</em></p><p>     Ghilina set her jaw as she shook the memory from her mind, viciously blinking back the sting of tears that they often brought. Instead she forced her mind away, placing an elbow on the desk as the width of her forehead rested between her thumb and forefinger. </p><p>     The bite from the ever cooling breeze made her involuntarily shudder, but she did not tear her focus from the documents she pored over by candlelight. Documents that had gone neglected in the days leading up to Corypheus, and she was determined to keep her mind busy.</p><p>     A quick set of knocks echoing from her chamber door startled her as she looked up, the door swinging open before she could answer. </p><p>     Walking inside was the dashing dark-haired, bronze-skinned Dorian whose curled mustache bowed with his frown.</p><p>"Honestly," he complained, crossing the room in a long-legged stride to the open balcony, "I haven't the foggiest how you could concentrate on anything with this cold."</p><p>     He pulled the balcony doors shut with a clatter as Ghilina watched with an amused grin, leaning back in her seat, arms folded.</p><p>"To what do I owe the pleasure of your company, mister Pavus?" Ghilina asked.</p><p>"You know I am to return to Tevinter, yes?" Dorian began, "It has been many months since we defeated Corypheus, and I cannot postpone my journey much longer."</p><p>"When are you leaving?" </p><p>"Tomorrow," he answered sadly, "I've given my goodbyes to the others. It will be strange to be without them. For my last night in Skyhold, I wanted to spend it with you."</p><p>Ghilina gaped with astonishment, "with me? What did you have in mind?"</p><p>Dorian reached for her hand and pulled her from her chair, "A few ideas, just know I won't take no for an answer. Come with me."</p><p>Ghilina couldn't help but smile as he led her from her chamber and down the stone steps.</p><p>     The blanket draped around her shoulders was thick and warm in the cold night, it failed to reach her toes which would feel the chill before too long. </p><p>     Ghilina heard the murmurs behind her and turned to look. Dorian was accepting two large steaming mugs from one of the kitchen girls whose head peaked up from the hole leading into the Mage tower. Ghilina admired the girl's courage, even now few were willing to brave the inside of the tower, much less climb the ladder to the roof. </p><p>     The girl gave Dorian a final toothy smile before the loud clack of boots against wooden ladder rungs signaled her descent. </p><p>     The mug Dorian offered was filled with a dark and hot liquid. Ghilina accepted the mug gingerly and wrapped her hands around its metallic surface, letting the warmth flow through her fingers and banish the wintry chill. </p><p>"I trust you wouldn't think I had it poisoned," Dorian teased lightly, "I'm told it's good for a wounded heart."</p><p>Ghilina could not hide the surprise from her face, to which Dorian greeted with a delighted laugh.</p><p>"You didn't really think you were hiding it, did you?"</p><p>Ghilina looked down, "I had hoped I was."</p><p>She took a drink from her mug to hide her embarrassment, and what greeted her was a dark, hot liquid that was rich and creamy as it coated her tongue thickly. It smoothly flowed down her throat.</p><p>"Chocolate?" She asked, staring into her mug.</p><p>"Hot Cocoa," Dorian corrected, "or so I am told. It was among the many gifts sent to the Inquisition for their help against the Red Templars. Quite popular in the more cold and rural parts of Orlais, I hear."</p><p>
  <em>     She watched him from beneath the lip of her cup as he sat across the table, a knowing smile on his face. He lifted his gaze for only a moment to meet hers. But a moment was all it took for her heart to flutter like the butterflies in her stomach.</em>
</p><p>     Her vision blurred as her eyes glimmered with tears. She looked skyward before they could fall, quickly blinking them away. </p><p>     Dorian took her cup from her hands then and placed it on the wall's ledge with his own, "There will be none of that."</p><p>     Before Ghilina could protest, Dorian had gently pulled her to his chest and held her affectionately. She could not hide the surprise from her voice, "Dorian, what-"</p><p>"If it is uncomfortable, I will stop." He interrupted, "I have seen how strong you have tried to be, you are the Inquisitor and no one should see you vulnerable. We both know I am not no one. I am not Cole so I have no way to offer help as he could, but I would still offer help as a friend. You can cry here, get angry, fume, with just us and no one else."</p><p>     Those words were all it took for the walls Ghilina had built to hold her up and make her strong, to crumble and collapse at his feet. Moment by moment, they fell like the tears from her chin. </p><p>     He continued softly, "What is tearing you apart shouldn't remain a part of you, you taught me that. Let it out, dear girl."</p><p>     She sobbed into his chest unceasingly, hands clutching at the fabrics of his mage robes. </p><p>
  <em>     Ghilina loved her hair, her hair very much like her mother's and all too uncommon among the Dalish, but it wasn't the best thing about her. It fell in raven-black waves against her luminously fair skin, so striking that it was one of the only things anyone in her clan commented on. But Solas, he barely seemed to notice it at all. Many times, she had caught him as he watched her like she held stars in her hands and left flowers in her wake. It was enough to bring heat to her face and wonder, fleetingly, what his lips might feel like against her own.</em>
</p><p>     The happy memories she had once treasured like kind and welcome friends in the darkest of times came to her now, each one bearing a dagger for her already vulnerable heart.</p><p>     Dorian only held her in silence, rocking her slowly and stroking her hair as the tears soaked his chest. </p><p>
  <em>     She stared back at him for what felt like hours as they exchanged shy, affectionate words in the snow, until finally she dropped her gaze, "Sweet talker," her voice was quieter now, less confident.</em>
</p><p>     <em>Ghilina dared herself to look up; a gentle flush of pink against her skin that was not because of the biting cold. She held her breath as she leaned up on the tips of her toes, turning his face to her's by the chin, before tentatively pressing her lips to his. </em></p><p>     <em>Her head had gone hazy; her body stagnant for all but the sensation of their lips intertwined, so sweet and silken, it was unlike any kiss before. </em></p><p>     <em>Before she could regret, to see the discomfort of her boldness on his face, she retreated. Only to feel his hands grip her and pull her back in for a more experienced kiss that robbed her of her breath and her heart.</em></p><p>     She trembled and whimpered between waves of misery. Minutes of sobbing broken apart by short pauses for breath. But always she returned, hurling herself back into the open arms of her grief until her whole world faded to black.</p><p>     Ghilina found herself in her own bed when she was startled awake by the familiar belly laugh of The Iron Bull.</p><p>"Oh come on, Kadan. By the look on your face when I found you, I'd have thought you never had seen a woman fainting before."</p><p>Ghilina's back was to them, she found as she opened her eyes. Instinctively, she remained still as she listened.</p><p>"Could you keep your voice down, Amatus?" Dorian chided, "Half the castle must have heard you, and in case it went unnoticed, the Inquisitor is sleeping."</p><p>"Besides," he continued, "the only women I had seen fainting were never my closest friends. This was new, and more concerning."</p><p>The Iron Bull grunted, "Judging by the dark circles under her eyes, she must not be sleeping well."</p><p>Silence descended on the room then, for so long that Ghilina began to think they might have silently slipped out. The silence was shattered unexpectedly when Dorian spoke. </p><p>"She must have been burying herself in work to keep her mind occupied." Dorian quavered with sadness, "You should have seen her when she finally let go, she was… beside herself with grief."</p><p>"I can guess. Just seeing that fake smile on her face for our benefit... She was holding everything back."</p><p>"You care much more than you pretend to, Amatus." Dorian teased.</p><p>Ghilina could hear the smile in Bull's voice, "Hey, I care a great deal."</p><p>"Of that, I am certain." Dorian gritted his teeth then, and continued, "What I cannot understand is how Solas could do this to her. No explanation, no closure, nothing. If I ever see him again, I'll… I don't know, but I'll do something to make him regret breaking her heart."</p><p>"You are a good one, Kadan. I don't know if she would like hearing you say that. But you're a good man all the same, and a good friend." The pride on Bull's voice was tangible. </p><p>"I try to be. Ghilina has become one of my best friends in such a short amount of time. She doesn't deserve this. What he did to her."</p><p>"No, she doesn't." Ghilina heard the creak of a chair, "We should go, Kadan. Let her rest. Besides, you're setting off tomorrow and I would hate to see you go without something to remember me by."</p><p>     Dorian giggled suggestively before he reluctantly agreed. Ghilina heard their receding footsteps shortly after, followed by the soft clatter of her chamber door.</p><p>She sat up in bed and stretched, her eyes were sore and swollen, no doubt glaringly red, and feeling puffy at the touch. Her cheeks felt stiff and worn from the dried tears, and her head ached. Yet despite all of that, she felt surprisingly refreshed. Perhaps some time on the balcony would help relieve some of the swelling and soreness she felt.</p><p>     She paused suddenly as Dorian and Bull's words sank in, had she really been that obvious? It shamed her to think they had noticed how hard she had been trying to prevent them from worrying about her, only for it to backfire. But as much as her heart yet pained and ached, there was a warmth that spread there in the holes left behind. Comfort taken in knowing she had such devoted friends who cared as much about her as she did for them. Friends she had come to consider more like a chosen family, a thought like a salve on a wounded heart that made her smile. A genuine smile that left a strange feeling after faking one for so long.</p>
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